Sad day

I found out this morning my grandma died.

She went in for gallbladder surgery three days ago. She didn't wake up from surgery until the next day and they found her kidneys were having a hard time working and her breathing was really labored. Last night the doctors said her kidneys had failed and they started taking her off all the meds she was hooked up to and they gave her some other drugs to make her comfortable. This morning her breathing was harder for her.

Thankfully she was surrounded by her kids when she took her last breath. She wasn't awake either and I heard she went very peacefully.

My grandma used to live near me up until about six or seven years ago. Since then I've only seen her twice. She moved back to WI to be near more of her family (she has nine kids and most of them live in WI). I wish so bad that I could be there to say goodbye and be at her service. There is no way I can fly right now...I could go into labor at anytime...

I believe in my head that God has a plan and things happen for a reason, but I'm starting to lose faith in my heart. The timing of events in my life over the past nine months or so have just sucked...I just don't see the reason...