At least we have the babies

I have to admit. Life at our house has not been pleasant so far in 2010. Between Hubby's health, some financial issues, and my own ups and downs, life sucks. The only think keeping me from a breakdown is knowing my lovely baby girls need me to stay healthy and not stressed. It almost seems like they know when I start to freak. When my mind starts going wild I'll feel a good swift kick to my spine or my bladder and I remember, no matter what else is going on, I am so lucky.

I am lucky to have gotten pregnant on our last try.

I'm lucky to not only get pregnant with one baby but two.

I am lucky to be pregnant with two babies who are growing perfectly.

I am lucky to be growing healthy babies, and staying fairly healthy myself.

Staying healthy and keeping these babies all snug and warm in my belly is the most important thing. I have to remember that. The rest of life is just fluff and will work itself out one way or another. So many thing are out of my control, but I can control my mind and not allow myself to stress out.

I do also have to admit I don't know how to deal with it all. My first reaction to any confrontation is to avoid it and leave. I was so tempted to pack a bag last night and leave for a couple of days, just to get away from it all. I didn't. I know everything will be waiting for me when I return.

I don't want to get into details, but this year, other than the fact we are going to have two newborns in a few months, is going to be the most challenging year I know for me personally, but I'm sure for Hubby and our relationship.

Sorry for the vague and depressing post. I just needed to vent or something...