Hodge Podge

Once again, it's taken me days and days to squeeze out a post. I've had several things I've wanted to blog about lately, but now...I don't have the time. So, I figured the best way to get my thoughts out was to just hit on each topic instead of doing a post for each thing.

- I hate pumping. It is evil. I'm not sure exactly why, but as soon as I get all hooked up and tugged on I get pissy. I'm instantly angry. It's 15 minutes of trying not to talk to anyone so I don't be mean. I have a hard time pumping when I'm supposed to. For one, since I hate it, it's hard to get motivated to keep on schedule. Two, with the girls being on different feeding schedules it's just one more thing to do at a certain time. I have the pump rented for a month, and I think I'm going to return it at the end of the month instead of renting it longer. I'm only getting about 1/3 of what they need anyway. And one last selfish excuse is having to deal with pumping at work. It would be a pain to deal with. I know, I know the breast is the best, but I think giving them what I can for a month is better than what some mothers do... That's my story, and I'm sticking to it. **Update, as of yesterday I quit pumping. It is nice not having to deal with it anymore, but I feel guilty for giving up early. And as my punishment my boobs hurt so bad! Yowza!**

- The girls. They are definitely different. Not only looks wise, but personality. Natalie is the small fry. She is quiet and seems so peaceful most of the time. Kaitlyn on the other hand, is the moose...and the noisy one. She squeaks and makes all kinds of noises all the time, which are usually so cute and I love to listen to, but she is also a screamer and a major crier. I seem to be the only one who can console her. My husband gets so frustrated because she cries and cries and there doesn't seem to be anything at times that can make her stop. Most of the time, if I grab her and hold her to my chest she'll stop. It's a love/hate thing for me. I love that I can comfort her and she can calm down when she's close to me, but I also hate it, because feel like maybe I shouldn't hold her so much so she doesn't rely only on snuggling with only me to feel better. I know she's only three weeks old and probably doesn't realize what's happening. I just don't want to make it a habit. I'm going back to work soon and I won't be home to comfort her all the time. It's something I really struggle with every time she cries. I've tried to let her "cry it out" a couple of times, but I don't have the heart to let her go on for very long. She's only three weeks old. Poor lil bugger.

- My hubby. God bless him. He has been doing a pretty darn good job for never being around babies before. He washes bottles, mixes formula, changes diapers, gets up for feedings at night. I know he gets really frustrated with them though. He mostly handles Natalie and I have Katie. I really don't like this set up. He should be bonding more with Katie, but her crying really drives him nuts. I see him get annoyed and I want to just take her back and love on her. He likes Natalie since she's so quiet. She's awake the most too so he gets to take care of the "easy one".

- Nighttime. Ugh. My mom stayed the night with us for two weeks. It was so nice. We've been on our own now for three or four nights and it's been rough. The girls rarely sleep at the same time. They eat at different times so it seems like there is constantly someone crying. Like I said before, Hubby gets Natalie and she mostly sleeps from feeding to feeding (about 4 hours or so). She does however like her pacifier and will wake up whenever it falls out. Unfortunately the cradle is on my side of the bed so I'm the one putting it back in her mouth constantly. Then Kaitlyn will cry and it takes about an hour to feed her, burp her and get her sleepy enough to go back to bed. She's waking up about every 3 hours to eat. The last two nights I think I've gotten about 3 hours of majorly interrupted sleep. Most of it has come after burping Katie and falling asleep with her in my arms in the recliner.

- Daytime. It is so quiet. I think the girls are so exhausted from being up all night they sleep during the day. I really should nap during this time, but usually I am busy washing laundry or bottles or feeding myself. It doesn't sound like much but the days fly by so fast! I've only been able to sneak in a shower every other day. I live in my pj's and other than having our pictures taken last week, I haven't put on a bit of make up for probably two months.

The swing has been a lifesaver. Both girls enjoy rocking in it and it gives us some time to put them down while they're awake to get some stuff done. Thankfully, yesterday, my friend brought over a second swing that she is no longer using. This will be nice since I generally have to evaluate who needs the swing the most and who could chill by themselves. Now they can both have a swing. Yay!

Well I suppose that's enough for now, especially since I have Katie in one arm and I'm typing with one hand now.